I didn't have time to write a post this week

I visited my sister and her family in Japan this week for my sister’s youngest son’s birthday. I don’t know why I just said “my sister’s youngest son” rather than just saying “my nephew”, but somehow saying “my nephew” makes me feel old, so I’ll just stick with “my sister’s youngest son”. Anyway, he’s on an overseas university program in Osaka studying Japanese.

I realize that it may sound like my family has an unhealthy obsession with Japan, but let me assure you, my family’s obsession with Japan is perfectly healthy.

Anyway, to put it simply, the tour-till-you-drop gene is shared between both of our families’ bloodlines. Due to a combination of our hectic touring schedule and my general aversion to doing things properly in advance, I didn’t have time to write a post this week. So, instead of writing a post, I’m writing about how I didn’t have time to write a post, which somehow makes this an actual post, which is some weird meta reality that’s too confusing and complicated for me to ever possibly understand, so I’m just going to stop trying.

To give an example of our schedule, on our second full day we boarded the train in the morning for a 2-hour ride from Osaka to the Shiga prefecture countryside, took a ropeway to the top of Biwako valley, walked around the grassy slopes of the mountain in the Japan summer heat, ate lunch, headed back down the mountain, took another train to the shores of Biwa Lake, rented floaties, swam in the lake, took a train and a bus further down the lake to hit up an authentic Japanese onsen, and had some wonderful yakiniku for dinner in our onsen robes (we were wearing the robes, not the yakiniku) before catching the bus back to the train station to head home.

The next day started with an early morning soufflé pancake breakfast in an attempt to beat the 40 person line which formed by 9am (those pancakes were so light they could have floated away), and then a trip to an Osaka-area amusement park with waterslides (which, by the way, due to me being, apparently by Japanese standards, a clinically obese 5’10” 81kg person - which could have been in part due to the pancakes - I was denied from boarding because of an 80kg weight limit, which I’m not bitter at all about, and I can assure you I did not spend the next 20 minutes with the slide attendant arguing about whether 81 is a bigger number than 80).

We then spent a few hours shopping, visited the teamLab exhibit in Osaka (which, for my subscribers who remember, is apparently different from the one in Kyoto), grabbed some amazing wagyu udon for dinner, and finished the night with some singing.

In any case, I’m not here to talk about how I spent the week in Osaka with my (healthily) Japan-obsessed family, touring every corner of Southern Japan like mental patients from dawn to dusk, capping that off with midnight karaoke sessions, or how much I thoroughly enjoyed their company and the time I spent with my awesome sister and her amazingly beautiful and talented family.

I’m here to tell you that the iOS app is still not ready.

App store registrations and actual app building started more than 2 months ago. In those 8 weeks, I’ve built and tested the Android app, registered my company account on the Google Play Store, submitted my app details for approval, performed three rounds of Play Store app testing, completed the full Google Play Store verification and approval process, and officially launched my Android app on the Google Play Store.

In that same amount of time, on Apple’s App Store, I’ve applied for an Apple developer account. The end. (I’m still waiting for their approval.)

Apple charges $99 per year for a developer account, which I’m yet to have even been provided the opportunity to pay.

Apple is kind of like that hard-to-get girl from high school who makes you work for that first date. I feel like I’m standing outside their window with a boombox playing ’80s love songs.

apple, how can i be a part of your world (and your wallet)?

Anyway, perhaps two more trips to Japan, and my iOS app should be ready for testing. Thinking about it, that actually sounds like a good idea. I’m gonna start checking flights.

Until then, mata kondo, my beautiful edamame. Hopefully I’ll have better news next week.

Oh, and happy 21st birthday, Leif!

greg

The only time my 7-year-old wasn’t complaining about his legs being tired was when one of his cousins was carrying him